Thursday, February 3, 2011

Healing theoryand what I am trying now

It seems to be a common theory that there is a linkage between stress and Fibromyalgia, and I can say this is what I believe, based on my own experience.  A huge part of my stress has been an unbelievable lack of support in my life -from my family, my church, my community, my "support groups" etc, Add on top of a rather amazing amount of bad luck, on top of some ignorant choices in relationships that turned out to be disastrously bad for many years beyond me trying to leave them behind, and a downright evil employer, all of which has been compounded by a broken-down "system". It's not just that I am broken down, but that so is the world we live in. I have been especially disappointed in the so-called "Christians" in my life.  I am a Christian who practices what I profess to believe, and I am not judging the ones I meet who don't.  I am just confused by them.  All that being said, I have been incredibly blessed to have met my new friend, who has been a neighbor for just over 2 years now.  We didn't connect up before now, I think because her life was taken up with other things. She has been wonderfully supportive, kind, nonjudgmental, and has encouraged me to talk to her about the years of gut-wrenching difficulties. She is a Christian in the truest way imaginable: compassionate. In the last couple of weeks I have shed buckets of tears, as I felt I would need to do if I was ever to heal.  I have known I was carrying them because I was so busy just coping with the difficulties, and trying to care for my children, that I never had the opportunity before to  process and grieve. It was so needed, and has been so good for me.  It isn't surprising then, that my pain levels have significantly decreased.  Maybe that is what all "fibromyalgics" need - to cry long and hard, to wash away the stress toxins that build up in our bodies, and won't leave through any other means- diet, "detoxes", exercise/sweat, meditation/relation, and all other means.  I saw on some cable show recently, that scientists analyzed tears - all kinds of peoples tears, and found that they are full of stress chemicals.  Maybe tears are the best way, or maybe even the only way, to clear the poisons from our bodies.  Regardless of others, this is working for me. I am deeply grateful to my Higher Power, and my friend.

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